If you’re new at learning how to defy OCD, there’s one thing you’ve got to be ready for. It’s important that you not be surprised when this happens. Expect it and be ready.
It was a very early Saturday morning. There were maybe 10 cars in the entire parking lot of Home Depot. I felt relaxed and excited about my day. I had just spent over an hour selecting vegetables and flowers for my gardens. I was carefully loading the tomato plants into my car when a huge truck appeared. This changed everything.
A Dodge Ram pulled into the parking spot next to me and the guy behind the wheel laid on his horn. He yelled for me to close my car door so that he could park next to me. I looked around and saw 100’s of empty parking spots. Why’s this guy gotta park here? I motion to him “one minute” and continued to unload. He nudged his truck closer and now I’m pinned between his bumper and my open car door.
He said, “I told you to move” and called me some unspeakable vulgar names. I said “OMG, fine! Back up and I’ll move.” I noticed the woman sitting next to him had a black eye. He backed up just enough for me to move the cart and close the door. I went to the other side of my car and he pulled into the space he was so determined to get. He got out of the truck and started calling me more names. Nothing I care to repeat. I was steaming mad and said, “Come and say that to my face.”
Great idea Tammy. He stormed right over to me and grabbed both my arms and shook me like a rag doll. He called me every name in the book and my face was covered in his spit. He let go and said, “Go ahead and call the police.” He walked into Home Depot and the woman with the black eye stayed in the truck. I looked at her and said, “Let me guess how you got that black eye.”
I was shaking so badly I could barely call 911. “I’ve just been grabbed at Home Depot.” They thought I meant I’d been kidnapped and sent what seemed to be the entire police force. I walked towards the first police car that arrived but the guy was coming out of the store and reached the police officer first. The two of them talked and I was told to stand off to the side and wait. Meanwhile many other police cars and motorcycles arrived. No one spoke to me. I was puzzled. Who is this guy? I’m the one that called 911 and no one wants my side of the story?
The police officer finally told the guy to wait in his truck and he came over to me. He said, “This guy says you chased him all over the parking lot. He said you were screaming at him and jumping on his back.” I tried telling the officer what happened and he shook his head, “There’s a witness in his truck. Apparently she saw what you did.” I asked if he noticed her black eye. “The only thing I did that was confrontational was dare him to say what he was saying to my face.” The officer replied, “Well right now he’s thinking about pressing charges against you.”
An officer listening nearby got off his motorcycle and came up to us. He looked at the other officer and said, “Don’t you see the bruises on her arm from where he grabbed her?” I looked at my arms and was shocked at the black and blue ring around both of my arms. The officer who had been on the motorcycle took over the investigation.
I’ve got the names of the the guy who shook me like a rag doll and the name of the first officer who sided with him. It turns out they’re related and their names are OCD.
Just like OCD:
Neither one of them cared about the evidence. The first officer came to a conclusion without any facts. Just a story. The guy told a story based on nothing but thoughts and feelings. No facts. Thoughts and feelings aren’t facts. But, just like the two of them, OCD treats thoughts and feelings like facts.
The guy and the first officer made me feel in the wrong. The first officer did not uphold my fundamental human rights and give me equal respect. They both made me feel small—like I had no voice of my own. Just like the two of them, OCD is overbearing and “always right.”
My freedom was taken from me—exactly what OCD does. I was pinned and restrained. I was told when to move, how to move and where I was allowed to stand. OCD is all about imprisonment.
The guy only became more aggressive when I confronted him. OCD is a big force to reckon with and you better believe that when you start to boss it back, it’s only going to get louder and more intense. (Don’t be surprised by this #1 OCD trick!)
The guy and the first officer wasted a lot of my time. My plans were side tracked. I was so excited about planting my garden and suddenly I’m caught up in a mess. Just like the two of them, OCD has the power to rob you of living your life.
The first officer was biased and one-sided. The officer did not serve with fairness or impartiality. Neither does OCD. The problem with OCD is that it can’t look at something from all angles. It can’t reason. Just like the two of them, OCD wears blinders.
OCD has only one viewpoint and it doesn’t matter how ridiculous and outrageous that perspective is. The guy that assaulted me was in excellent shape, muscles protruding everywhere and he towered over me by at least a foot. Yet, the first officer actually believed that I was the aggressor. Ridiculous! But, just like OCD, the officer could only see it one way.
OCD is nothing but a liar and can’t even recognize the truth. Just like the guy who lied and said I was the aggressor. I was telling the truth but the officer didn’t believe me. OCD doesn’t believe the truth either. You can tell it the truth until you’re blue in the face and it won’t believe you. Think of all the reassurance you’ve gotten by other people that “it’s not you, it’s just OCD”—and OCD just doesn’t buy it.
OCD is not based on evidence. It’s based on thoughts and feelings. Which aren’t facts.
OCD tells you the opposite of what is true. That’s the nature of the disorder.
OCD makes you a prisoner and chips away at your confidence and self-worth.
You can’t reason with OCD and shouldn’t even try. It’ll just take you down the rabbit hole and so much time will be wasted.
Don’t be Surprised by this #1 OCD Trick: If you decide to boss it back get ready for OCD to push harder. Don’t give in. Be patient. It’s how you’ll win. At first it feels overwhelming and intense. But, stay steady on the course and it’ll get easier. The main point is not to be surprised when it happens.
If you can think of other ways the guy (his real name was Guy, by the way) or the first officer resemble OCD please leave an anonymous comment! I’m sure I’ve missed a few!